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Swell

by Pillea

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  • "The Freak" T-shirt - Bleach Tie Dye on Black
    T-Shirt/Apparel + Digital Album

    The Freak loves to take care of their plants.
    Illustrated by Seb Elbourne (www.sebelbourne.com)

    Printed on Alstyle cotton shirts.
    ----
    NOTE: This item was bleached by hand, and will not appear exactly like the included image. The shirt has been washed in cold water to remove the bleach after dyeing and ironed before shipping.

    Includes unlimited streaming of Swell via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

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  • "The Freak" T-Shirt - Black
    T-Shirt/Apparel + Digital Album

    The Freak loves to take care of their plants.
    Illustrated by Seb Elbourne (www.sebelbourne.com)

    Printed on Alstyle cotton shirts.

    Includes unlimited streaming of Swell via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

    Sold Out

1.
The Weight 03:25
Running got old Just when I thought I was comfortable, drama My legs tremble And it's a testament to my health to be on them The weight is nothing new Just trying to see it through Back to a me that you're used to I'm forgetful I indulge in every avenue of absence Get smarter though Catching crashing's easiest when it's a habit
2.
Can I build a new understanding of service while still respecting my own needs? I stare at the steeples on my walk home and joke with the idea of becoming pious I told you I remembered the day my dream died Stuck to my bed the first panic attack of my life Gave myself the night to think of why I'd even try I want a new vocation I need to be alone I'm giving up on great success I want to give you what I can I just want to feel that I tried to be honest There's a piece of me that left And that's probably for the best When I try to reason, I find "The Reasons" To me that dream what something that I'd just lust for and regret When I can't live up to some shit, I made up in my head I wanna build a skillset I don't want to work alone I want to share a moment I want you to feel whole I'm giving up on great success And I'm quite alright with that
3.
Suffering 02:54
Suffering is part of our condition When I was younger and became despondent I thought, will it end? I thought, can I mend? My suffering is a burden but I live it So we've got to limit our time with our demons I still trip up Until I've had enough I bet it feels so good to hate my guts I feel so stressed, I just want to be stoned So I'll cut you out, and I'll run my mouth I know it feels so good to get worked out I feel so stressed, I just need an outlet I won't give you that time or attention, no more
4.
Swell 02:41
I just feel like shit, I can't help it, so I'm clocking out 'Cause if I can't compete, then baby I'm nothing No backup plan for the gig life Taking debt scares me more than dropping out might I just can't talk about it Without swelling up and sounding like an asshole Well here I go Who am I to be dissatisfied? Would I rather fail than die? It's about that part you catch me in my lie
5.
WIIP 01:56
What the hell am I mad at? I've built everything you see I just say that to feel like I could pack this up and do better When I'm tired of flailing I get high to stop myself I wake up the next morning And when the sun sets you'll find me saying Have I fucked up? I can't stop this now I'll sleep this off It'll all work out Wins are coming but just not today When I'm in panic I just have to breath
6.
Away 03:28
Rarely say I miss you so Perform indifference while we get stoned The art in your apartment is finally hanging straight We're growing It feels so cool 'til I come to in another room and you're a world away A budding 'stache, another man who double down to fast And you're a world away The corners we would catch up on Feel indifferent but different I know The bar is my apartment, and that's alright with me We'll close late I've been listening to all our favourite songs I've been cooking brunch and getting drunk to our old shows I've been deflecting by maxing out my To-do I've been thinking All and all these lessons taught can only make an impact if once you need some guidance, you feel precautions towards a loss I miss your face but we'll get past the distancing
7.
Sunday 01:54
Left your guilt in the confessional, a comfortable release "When Jesus spoke to proud nationals he never lived in our great country" The softball team where everyone looks like me The hot carafe whose drink I'll never have Sunday Rituals Old enough to know their weight Left your childhood in those fields, collapsed in your black shirt Woke up in a van, whose doors were welded shut Estranged at birth to half, enthralled by the other The guidance that you had, their beauty, and their struggle
8.
It's no harder here today I remember being nervous until I learned you felt the same And I tried to show restraint I'm a four-track in the shop, and it's more than just a cleaning But I'm not afraid, because I'm sick of eating tape There I go, steal your time again, and you're fine with it I can't help but to deflect When I give up space I panic, but it's easy when you're there You make me kind, and attentive You're a champion for our cause, and you shine even when tested I'll come to you when lost, and you help me find my strength Weather seasons and our loss, but still live for what we're chasing Got such a pretty face, when you put me in my place I'm showing up, you give so much, we're growing, trying to find our way

about

Micah Brown’s (he/him) debut album as Pillea mixes indie rock catharsis and the melancholy of emo into a familiar, yet refreshingly new set of eight songs. The self-produced record was made over two years and acts as a collection of discrete sonic spaces to create a larger cohesive and focused piece. Exploring the different edges of the genres across the album, while always tied together by Pillea’s distinct melodic sense, Swell is a dense debut worthy of repeat listens.

credits

released May 7, 2021

Written by Micah Brown

Engineered by Micah at the Sanctuary Theatre, Saint John NB, and Scrapi in Montreal, QC
Mixed by Billy Mannino at Two World's Studio in Queens, NY
Mastered by Harris Newman at Grey Market Mastering in Montreal, QC

All instruments performed by Micah except:

Ryan Brown - Drums tracks 1, 2, 4, 8
E.M. Hudson - Guitar tracks 2, 7, synths track 7, 8, arrangement song 2
Tom Burke - Drums track 6

Album art by Paige Sabourin
Photos by Zinnia Naqvi

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Pillea Toronto, Ontario

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